Good work.

"Don't you know who I am?!"

She got 99 problems but a rich ass dad aint one.

Holocaust

Rich white women are finally getting a shot.

Sometimes a kids gotta take a Mars bar to the cornea for cool shit like this to happen.

So does this fuckin' thing suck or what?

"The Arizona National Guard does not authorize nor condone the use of military aircraft or equipment for personal use."

Every Sunday I make my famous Stalinachos.

He would have gotten less time for raping Paris Hilton.

He has a point.

This is dumb.

"I'm your new [insert N-word here]!"

If by "cooler" you mean foisting awful shit pop on the rest of us older people with good taste in music then, yeah, that is accurate.

Did the Marlins guy find the ring?

Settle down, Azrael Abyss.

Settle down, missy.

So you can be a d-bag even when youre dead.

Wow, what a piece of shit.

Probably got the house after his parents died/retired to Florida.