You will never be the worst person with your name.

The guy doppelganging me is currently incarcerated for murder, and looks mean as hell. Thanks, google!

Schreer also specified to have the "sad piano version" play at his funeral as they cut to commercial.

Connors is so serious about this that he also traveled to Malawi to personally ink the villagers with Denver Broncos Super Bowl XLVIII Champs tattoos.

Kind of sort of pretty much sort of, actually. I think what you have is Hubbard being an especially active dabbler in alternative religions before breaking ways with Parsons and eventually inventing Dianetics. (By "breaking ways with Parsons," I mean Hubbard and Parsons' sister-in-law/common-law wife, Sara Northrup,…

A sleepover at the Mütter Museum (home of the world's largest megacolon) sounds like a great recipe for nightmares. Yikes!

Your next article should be on how there is no science to prove that cleanses are healthy for you or "required" and actually a couple that show that you may be worse off after the cleanse. If you want to cleanse, eat some damn fruits and vegetables that are high in fiber and some lean protein.

What I really like about these is how reading and intellectualism are conveyed in such a masculine and powerful manner. Our current culture far too often portrays intellectualism and higher learning as being in direct opposition to the machismo qualities so many young men idolize in our society.

There's a large chunk of Seattle that IS underground, way back before the streets were elevated. You can still take tours down there, it's very interesting.

I'll just leave this here.

They whole time they were beating the guy they kept yelling 'World-Star Country & Western!'

If this had happened in Philadelphia, the fans around him would have reacted largely the same as those in Buffalo, but they would have been universally described as beating him to death before the paramedics got there.

Why is the one wearing a Rockstar™ vest? I feel like this is viral marketing and FTW and Deadspin just took the bait.

Seem stupendously safe, so someone said.

Don't help them up, you're the Schiano Man,

Even angrier, Bahston-ier, and cursing Kennedy:

Maybe Smith just wanted to see who he really was under there.

I preferred KLAX.

Placekicker Brian Tradition really didn't care one way or the other.