What’s worse is that there’s probably a perfectly lovely girl he knows who’d put up with his shit and love him, except he thinks he can do better.

Look, the sex doll having a mouth and a lower slot is probably all he needs to be content.

I’m sure the ball will have a place of honor in his mom’s basement.

I wonder what his girlfriend think about all th.... hahahahahaha, sorry couldn’t make it to the end.

Another year and another lack of Daria funkos.

Disney acquiring, I dunno, let’s say Canada.

What’s the difference between guys swapping jersey numbers vs someone being traded to/acquired by another team as far as Nike is concerned? Should free agency and trade deadlines be based on Nike’s needs too?

“There’s even been at least one case of a player having someone sneak a phone in and tape it to the underside of a toilet’s tank to hide it.”

So in addition to the stop sign infraction the cop is on the hook for unlawful arrest and illegal imprisonment.

It’s to make sure the Troopers commit enough civilian violence. I hear they recruit heavily out of Arizona.

Those of us over 30 all saw Terminator 2.

That’s good to know, my retirement plan involves being shot by a Minute Maid Park security guard.

Maybe not.

Agreed, it’s like taking your kid front row to a NASCAR race and being upset that metal shrapnel is flying all over the two of you when someone puts it in the wall.

At the very least give the infant a glove and a fighting chance 

Safety aside, from an enjoyment perspective, I don’t know why you would bring a 2-year-old child to a baseball game, it can’t possibly be fun for anyone involved. And if you can afford the lower deck, you can afford a sitter.

It’s violent and kind of silly. It’s campier than most comic book movies these days, but certainly not Batman & Robin or X-Men Apocalypse level of bad. I found it entertaining but harmless. Mileage may vary depending on how intense your feelings are about Spider-Man lore, etc.

It’s... frustrating. There are clearly hints of a better film in here with some interesting and creative uses of the character and his powers. There’s a decent central performance, some of the jokes are pretty good and one or two of the supporting cast should definitely be kept for the sequel. But the story is pretty…

“I gave him a lot of stuff.”