I’m always surprised about how many men don’t recognize abusive or harassing behavior from women, or who fear recognizing it as such out of what that might mean about themselves in terms of some conception of what it means to “be a man”. I’m glad you pointed this out to DAFT.

Preach it Doc! Preach it!

If you just want to look out for yourself and take the easy way out, go ahead with the divorce, but if it's someone you actually care about and want to be with, seek professional help first.

And then they are even better at convincing the abused that they need to have the abuser in their life.

It's time for you to leave. And it's going to be hard. Odds are that she's going to pull every trick in the book to keep you around. She'll guilt-trip you about leaving her all alone. She'll call you weak and selfish, and insist that you're the one who's fucked up and list way after way that she's "supported" you. I…

Yes, they may call you a bitch. Fine. Be a bitch. Be Queen Bitch, First of Her Name, Lady of Bitchatonia, Ruler of Hands-Fucking-Off-Or-You-Pull-Back-A-Stump.

If the genders were reversed in that scenario and the woman was being abused, would you tell her she needs to try to work it out and help her husband get mental help? No. You wouldn't. You'd scream from the rooftops to get away from him as soon as possible and never look back. Frankly the idea that you think he should…

I made the mistake of looking this up. This might be the most horrifying thing I have read about PUA techniques yet. Holy fuck.

*claps at response #2*

Something I'm learning that the second letter writer probably needs to learn. If your boundaries don't fit the construct of whatever group/relationship/situation you are in, find a new one. There hundreds of other places that you will fit into and it's not worth it to force yourself to be uncomfortable repeatedly. By…

So, I normally lurk about here and there for most of the Gawker Networked sites, but I feel like I should add a few things to this.

The letter from The Sad One broke my heart, and I found myself identifying with his (or her) situation. Since you asked, I've got some suggestions for healing after an abusive relationship. I got out of a long-term abusive relationship a couple years ago, and now I am in a new relationship that is happy and fulfilling…

I'm in an extremely similar situation to TSO and I'm finally detangling myself from it. Thankfully not married so this process is much simpler. All I can say is GTFO as soon as you can and never look back. If you want to help her on the way out suggest that she seek treatment for her obvious mental health issues (she…

Oh man the emotionally abusive girlfriend, I've been down that road. Was the most confusing and worst relationship I've ever had, good sex though. Well before the bad stuff started she warned me that a previous boyfriend had told her that she had a problem. I forgot how she described it but she understood that she was…

that socg story is what terrifies me about having a sister in first year university living on campus. I occasionally convince myself she'd probably maul a guy who did something she doesn't like but still. Some (own race group) males are the absolute bottom of the barrel

(Want to know how you can tell this is bullshit? Are they grabbing the teacher's boobs? No? Then they fucking well know better.)

Good luck.

Is putting your kids in a position where they learn it's okay to hold someone emotionally hostage to a marriage and abuse them better?

I can relate to TSO. Currently in a similar marriage. But I have 2 young children with her. Whats the right thing to do? My parents divorced when I was young. And I promised myself to never put my own kids through that.