Pigs are so out of control these days.

Somewhere Tom Ley is playing the tiniest violin.

Belgian Gothic is maybe the best beer ever brewed. My local store (Hops and Grapes in Rogers Park) just started carrying Pipeworks and that’s what I started with.

Founders has soooo many awesome beers.....but you’re writing about literally the worst one.

Sidenote: I just discovered Pipeworks Brewing in Chicago. MUST MUST MUST try.

I had never heard of Burneko until a few years ago, when he wrote an article blasting people who avoid gluten if they did not have celiac disease. The jist was ‘It’s all in your head, no matter what good results you see. Stop being a pussy and eat gluten.’ Basically I thought it was awfully stigmatizing and the…

Albert Burneko is an angry, small man.

But super happy Burneko isn’t?

Don’t talk the talk, if you can’t walk the walk. Phony niggas are outlined in chalk.

Let’s evolve, man. That was a hundred years ago.

“Simmons’s contract?”

You’re not very good at this internet thing, Jeff.

How nice that all of these poor student athletes were able to afford very expensive playoff tickets!

Mexico is my favorite producer of warm weather beers....when someone who writes about beer for a living calls them “catastrophically bad at brewing beer” ...it makes me question that person’s beer intelligence.

“You don’t hold elected office in this town. You run it because people think you do. They stop thinking it, you stop running it.”

“ I’d say we both did killer jobs.”

You picked 3 of the last 4 Derby winners? So you hit Orb at 5-1 (plausible since he was the betting favorite)? You hit I’ll Have another at 15-1 (getting less believable) AND you hit Animal Kingdom at 21-1 (GTFOH liar)? Utter bullshit.

“About twelve inches.”

“Huh?”

I’m calling bullshit right now. He clearly picked it up off the ground, stuffed it in his beer, and then didn’t even pound the whole thing. I’d call it embarrassing all the way around.

If Donald Sterling can be forced to sell a two billion dollar asset because of something he said in his private home, she can lose her stupid little job for being an insufferable cunt to an innocent nine-to-fiver. I didn’t make America like this. Shit like Gawker did.