Jason,

I don't understand why "attempted" murder carries a shorter sentence than actual murder. Like, you get less time because you're incompetent? And the person you want to kill is still out there and you will be released from jail within that person's lifetime. ISNT THE GOAL HERE TO PREVENT FUTURE MURDER?!??!

is this what happens to someone's sense of humor when they read Atlas Shrugged over and over?

I think that to the Food Babe, natural means "anything that doesn't scare me or gross me out."

"There's a truly bizarre strain of anti-intellectualism running through both ends of the political spectrum, fostered by people who instinctively distrust anything beyond their immediate comprehension"

there's a good chance you'll be swirling secretions from a beaver's anal glands around in your mouth.

You know what chemical in food really scares me? That DHMO, dihydrogen monoxide. Scary stuff.

"there is no acceptable level of any chemical to ingest, ever"

Yeah I think it was in my Facebook feed where someone was complaining about Missy Elliot being in the SB halftime show, specifically that she "hasn't done anything new for a decade" and someone else said "well probably because she's been dropping the proverbial mike for a decade and nobody can get close enough to pick…

I'm pretty sure "what did she expect?" is not the appropriate reaction to a woman facing sexism in the workplace.

As a nearly middle aged white guy I can tell you old white guys are pretty much the worst people on the planet. It's really strange at times to be in their presence when they assume they can "really speak their mind in like minded company" (in essence surrounded by other white dudes). The entitlement and privilege…

Would.

A lot of straight dudes have craaaaazy expectations (e.g., Kate Upton is a fattie).

How do you not feel her magic at the core of your very being?

Well, yes, but the comments were virtually all along the lines of "Oh my Goooooood, what has she done to her face?!!!!!!!!!! Why do celebrities get such shitty plastic surgery and ruin their faces????!!!" Which, in retrospect, was maybe a wee bit of an overreaction to someone just not putting on mascara.

The makeup artist just didn't contour Uma's face in a way we're used to seeing, and used minimal eye makeup. But of course, being a woman, Uma's face is always up for judgement. There's nothing wrong in saying, "Uma, your makeup is terrible," (as it is simply an opinion) but saying that her face is jacked is messed…

First rule, never start with a liquid when dealing with soot or smoke. Start with a stiff brush and remove as much as possible. Then move onto the soot eraser. Then try your liquid degreasers. Lastly I would use an acidic tile and grout cleaner. Personally, I would contact local fire and smoke restoration contractors…

Another issue with silicone lube is showers. Because it's not water soluble, if you take a shower after sex (or take a sex while showering, so to speak), you can get silicone lube on the shower floor. At which point your shower becomes a skating rink, and rinsing it off isn't sufficient.

I like how half this post is still dedicated to cleanliness. You can take the poop-smeared wang out of the Clean Person, but you can't take the Clean Person out of the poop-smeared wang. (Or something.)

Fuck the Giving Tree and its unreasonable standards of parenting. I want to retire not be a boat for my kids.