We might have been separated at birth. Glad you’re ok and didn’t rip the dress!

+10000000 on the His Girl Friday ref.

Emergencies like “didn’t do laundry for a week” or “didn’t do laundry for two weeks”. It’s a backup!

Having gotten stuck taking off the sports bra I keep for emergencies as recently as last week, I feel so seen. 

Massive eyeroll dot gif slash fuck off you corny pissbaby.

Meh. The Kardashians are no more and no less bullshit than any other form of entertainment and it’s suspect AF to call them out specifically  when that criticism is more borne out of a latent misogyny than of a grounded cultural critique. Low-brow doesn’t mean low value. 

Women can hold more than one thought in their heads at any given time and people who use the Kardashians as an example of “everything wrong with society” are the most fucking boring people on earth. Wow, what a contribution you have made to the discourse! 

it could have been a trade for tacos and it would be ok, too.

It seems to me that it’s less about *this* is normal and it’s more about *here are a lot of things and they are all just fine*. Just being able to see your body shape, size, color out there in the wild is affirming, whether or not it’s qualified at all. 

Dude, Chicago PD is corrupt af and while bootlicking cops is ALWAYS bad in this case, it’s especially embarrassing. Have a google: https://www.chicagotribune.com/news/local/breaking/ct-met-chicago-ronald-watts-victims-lawsuit-20190215-story.html

When you bite into a spoiled apple, you don’t have to eat the whole apple to know it’s no good. 

Oh, 100% this. She expects a call from me every day with updates (I don’t lead the kind of life that would justify updates) but my dad was in the hospital with a very serious heart thing and she “didn’t want to worry me”. I wonder if I’ll be a weirdo of this magnitude when I’m in my late 60s. 

I constantly have to remind myself that Twitter noise isn’t real life.

She also tells me who she is on the voicemail and what time it is. 

We do like to eat our own. 

I’m not not-a-fan of AOC, but she was won her primary by a laughably small number of actual people, and while she won the general handily, the district was safe for even a democratic potato to run and win. Her “ride or die” crowd is likely very, very small. 

or like when you text someone, and they call you back, and then they leave a voicemail and then they text you that they left you a voicemail. (hi mom!)

“Women have lower fitness standards in the military than Men, yet they still get paid the same amount as men who work harder than they do and have to meet tougher standards than they have to.”

How fast you run a mile and how many chin-ups you can do is not the basis of your military salary as your job in the military…

Chicago PD also has a rich history of killing people and covering it up, and operating a quasi extrajudicial torture center but WHO CAN NEVER BE SURE.  

Just finished the first five episodes and it’s.......................... as the whole thing is falling apart and they’re having to recall/void thousands of results for real patients, it turned from “oh wow, what a world-class scam” to “holy shit someone could have died”.