Passionate Colonoscopy was already taken.

The $300 per couple meal plan is a jip.

I feel the same way about overly gigantic tie knots.

Amazon Car Reviews? So like Yelp, minus the pretentiousness and basic attention to literary quality? I get there are a couple clever zingers here and there, but nothing even in the neighborhood to the Three Wolf Moon-level snark.

Wait, what? What’s Ohio then- you claiming them for the northeast?

He looks like the rubber mask that nobody buys until it’s five minutes before the Halloween party you forgot about.

Douchin’s Eleven

Maybe if those kids got jobs they wouldn’t be so poor.

Worst heist movie ever.

come to mama

“If we can’t get 750, we respectfully thank you but we’re going to move on.”

Dak feels like he could take on the entire Empire himself!

Romo is so unlucky, if it were raining pussies he would get hit with a Dak

lol

He reminds me of Tracy Jordan from 30 Rock. If somebody tells him not to do something suddenly that’s all he wants to do, and does. Only Trump is wildly less intelligent or talented but with 100 times the ego.

Apparently now it’s “The speech was staged in front of a green screen!” Why that would matter in the slightest, even if true, is beyond me.

Calling them the Alt-right makes them sound like some sort of folk/punk genre

The timing and tone of this are Samurai-level politics.

Nailed it.

This doesn’t sound like CTE symptoms. More like early adult onset schizophrenia.