I'm so dirty, the doctor says it's easier to test for which disease I DON'T have. I'm so dirty, my last three-way turned into an eight-way and there were only seven people there!*

I'm a dirty slut and I find this offensive.

In Russia, the forest arrests you!

I married his twin brother four years ago and am really bumming!

Or hang out in Chelsea. Amiright?

Rob fell in love with a wonderful woman. They were going to have their wedding at their friend's castle, but the friend was so cranky that you didn't eat your peas at dinner tonight that he killed them. Always eat your veggies, kids.

I love "Fargo!"

David Justice is not justice either.

I felt that way after I made out with R. Kelly, too.

Did anyone check out the Courtney Stodden link? It's a ridiculous, faux-paparazzi photo shoot in a supermarket! What?!??! Is it art imitating life, life imitating art, or cheese imitating Velveeta? So weird!

Is that a crack berry?

No! Santa's not real??? Spoiler alerts, people!

I do have my menses and may be a bit irrational.

The song doesn't have to be good. It's a marketing/ sales tool for her craptastic perfume.

Please call him Tim Riggins. The name Taylor Kitsch makes my lady bits shrivel up.

Perhaps someone served the NBC execs some "chocolate mouse" and when they woke up, they didn't remember signing off on the deal.

Not what I usually think of when I picture a shaved pussy.

Well done! I love that it can be interpreted as being colorful and festive OR a crazy turkey-sequel alien that is avenging its race. You know, depending on what kind of day your guest is having. Thanks for sharing!

I didn't realize that was him!

He's lucky! She's lucky! We're all lucky! (THE BANISTER'S LUCKY!!!!)