And it wasn't just spit it was SALIVA spit. Spit made from SALIVA!!! It was not a loogey. It was SALIVA spit. Read more

I had the opportunity to meet him at a Bouchercon some 20 years ago. I was just a lowly bookseller, but he was very gracious and charming. Take a lesson from that, Sue Grafton.

You seem surprised. It's more like "Donald Trump wrote that." With a period.

Where is this that they put RAMPS in front of big gaps in the freeway? Are you encouraged to try and jump them? WTF? Read more

You should have called this "How to Set Fire to Your Sticky, Slimy Kitchen".

I've used it a few times fom Chicago to Columbus, OH and back. It's not bad...$50 isa lot cheaper than driving. But then the train/cab combo to get to the 'burbs is a pain.

Why is Janelle Monae always having more fun than I have ever had?

Uh, we should talk...you're not as "fresh" as you could be.

You're lucky that MP wasn't named Major Reacher because Jack reacher would have sent both of you to the hospital.

My home would be REALLY cozy because my bus was considerably shorter than that one.

I like your style.

So, should I go to this really great bar that has a live band but the beers are like $5 or should I go to a local crappy bar where it's an acoustic act and the beers are $2.50? Read more

Wasn't there a high school in PA a while back that was spying on kids and their families through the webcam on the school-provided laptops? Read more

I must be the most creative motherfucker to ever live.

I was kinda going with the silicone pirates. Manly men after big fake boobs.

Well, based on the last soda article, I imagine killing a hobo with a hammer is some good cardio.

I can watch Unwrapped for hours on end. Read more

This makes me embarrassed to be a man. Jesus, Thor, just shut the fuck up. And that sweater? No.

Here's a story about my Mom (RIP): Read more

Because that scene would have sucked if the guy with the cleaver had turned around and said, "Hi. How are you? As you can see, we're cannibals."