My wife likes to list the myriad of things she has to do and wear to get ready on a daily basis anytime I bitch about the one or two times a year I need to wear a tie. This does not placate my eternal suffering.

Fuck Ties

Cowherd just demonstrated how completely clueless and out of the loop he really is.

At least Cowherd is going after a white guy for once.

Just want to say thanks for making me look up 'frenulum'. Educational Deadspin is best Deadspin.

As a post 9/11 world-liver-inner, I feel like I should be ticked at the NFL for not really caring enough about safety for fans, but after the way they treat their players, I guess it shouldn't surprise me.

aWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWkward

I'm just commenting here so I don't get fined.

"Here's where things get fun. First, the author goes to CAPS for the first time. Get ready for MORE caps later."

Robert Kraft loves monkey puppets too. He named one of them Roger Goodell.

Looks like someone hasn't read the new Kinja terms of service.

Good. I'm glad you liked it. Glad. You. Liked. It.

I like how you repeated "exactly why" for emphasis. It really made your point.

It was Brett Favre. Brett Favre fucked the footballs, and they lost air. With his tiny penis.

[meh]

I, for one, hope this asshole feels the full brunt of the league's disciplinary process and gets himself suspended for like two weeks.

That's why you post a video in your Facebook feed, Russ, then nobody from the NFL will ever see it.

The league's security apparatus sure is quick and thorough on such important matters.

Call Mike Francesa and bitch?

Breaking News: Yankees don't want to pay historically bad contract they agreed to