True. Once had a girlfriend who was a nurse, and she said that if you came into the emergency room with something up your bum or your willy trapped in something the entire hospital knew about it in about three minutes.

After last year, Norman? Really?!

Lang is looking more and more like Lee Van Cleef.

The original Deadpool 3 announcement was Ryan Reynolds asking Miller ‘Hey TJ, wanna play Weasel again?’, as he inexplicably goes upstairs in someone else’s house. Now everything’s ruined......

Misprint, meant to read ‘on a par with The Da Vinci Code’. 

You know why the Stemplayer failed? Yep, the Jews. That’s the reason. And the fact that it was an overpriced scabby ballsack pre-filled with absolute shit.

The reviews are terrible across the board, but no one has so far used the headline ‘Croc Of Shit....’

Errrr.... I don’t think you’ll have to fight your way through the hysterical, uncontrollable crowds to get to the ticket desk.....

Looks like an awful lot of people watched the trailer and thought ‘nope....’

Drink apple juice all night and you be up for hours, peeing.

You call it ‘a spongy, emulsified chicken patty with grill marks’, but it’s Subway, so it could be f*cking anything....

‘a Mexican Pizza, Soft Taco Supreme, Nacho Doritos Locos Taco, a chili cheese burrito, a steak quesadilla, and a Baja Blast’. ‘Rock-solid’ is the perfect word to use after scoffing all that....

Reminds me of a story when they did colour test footage of Laurel and Hardy, I believe in the 40s. The chemical composition and processing method at the time couldn’t capture the cornflower blue of Stan Laurel’s eyes so he looked like Little Orphan Annie, white blank eyes with tiny black corneas. They stuck to black…

*looks at the chicken and mushroom Pot Noodle he is having for lunch, and the cup of instant coffee made with milk which is just on the turn*

Outside, up the wall. 

Ah, a couple of articles on the film said that Michelle Yeoh failed to persuade Chan to play the husband. I stand corrected. But still one of the films of the year, I sort of thought I knew roughly what I was going to get but was utterly knocked out. 

In a role which was originally offered to Jackie Chan, who turned it down, which worked out great since Ke Huy Quan was fabulous in it. 

“Ultimately, Earth Spain will rest on whether Elio can fight through his self-doubt and prove to the universe that that’s part of being human, just being yourself.” Does this make any sense to anybody?

An albino actor?

Explains why this repellent little gecko is so fond of his own family, with their higher than average number of fingers and toes. And heads.