‘ Alas, poor Yor-’ *bang!**ping!* ‘Forsooth, that was fucking close, my liege......’

Exactly, Lordstown essentially only exists on paper, and as I was reminded, that’s also what your wipe your ass with.

Magnificent opening paragraph, Allison, just avoided giving the keyboard a coffee marinade. You can tell it’s Friday....

‘There’s only one good corner of the internet, and it’s the corner where you can find videos of animals entering human establishments’. Apart from that one with the mouse and the deep fryer in a WhataBurger....

A couple of days ago I wondered what Hal Hartley was up to so looked him up. Apparently not much, his last feature was Ned Rifle in ‘14 and his last TV work was some episodes of the series Red Oaks, of which I am not familiar. Was a time you couldn’t move at a film festival for Hartley films, panels and…

‘Ask your Mum’.

I was in Italy when Happiness opened a couple of decades ago, and unfortunately the posters read ‘Un film di Toad Solondz’. Looked for it online but no joy, aptly.

A Full English with croutons. Classy.

Exactly, this has been around for centuries, but wait until my Washington Post article on how I make coffee with both water and - wait for it....... - milk!!

That was the original title of ZZ Top’s Smart Dressed Man...

Did she ever eat at Hungry Jack’s?

Try the wonderful https://garfieldminusgarfield.net/

Look at that face! Just says ‘Who? Me?!’

For my current monster preferably something alive, which it doesn’t remain for very long.

‘When we go, provided that nobody pisses me off  in the car, everyone is allowed to have exactly one item from the concession stand.’ Corrected that for you.

‘Discount Pork Fiesta’ perfectly fits the metre of Funky Cold Medina. Once you know that you can’t get it out of your head.

Name checks out....

I like the subtle difference between ‘No pooping in our parking lot’ and ‘Stop pooping in ......’

I’ve only ever heard of Beech Nut chewing gum.

e-Bay.