Allergic to red > Allergic to crunchy

The "lady" in the last story sounds like a real half-wheat...

That's my kind of ram, taking opponents out the game.

Just another silly Deadspin post that hardly warrants two paragraphs, right? Not in the DC area. NOPE! This will make up the entire sports talk conversation on the ride home, about how RGDiva CRAVES the spotlight, how RGME always brings negative attention to the team, how RG3andout will NEVER be a great pocket…

What an idiot. She does know they were searching for the most cavalier dancer, right?

Agreed. Nobody could do a song that is a complete parody of itself and make it completely kick ass like 2000ish Beck.

She hopped on the sticks like he was going to take it easy.

See, what makes Pratt special is not just that he thought immediately of sandwich dick, but that even with sandwich dick in play he still went the extra mile and sold it with the look. We're looking at an all-timer here.

Hold on now. Judging by this photographic evidence, Fat Joe has had an amazing career in recent years as Pitbull.

Here's an idea: women can send the opening message once in a while!

Before I deleted my account I would always ask women the same thing: "So do you want to hear a ridiculous pick-up line or should we skip the awkward stuff."

Why can't everyone just use Would You Rather questions as their openers? I mean, it's conversational and ideally accessible to everyone.

Tonight I'm making nachos, watching pirated Oscar screeners, and maybe smoking a little weed.
Should I make enough nachos for two?

Your troll is just a product of your company system. You're not the best troll of all time, so we'll hold off on that discussion, but well done.

Watching fans' dreams die never gets old.

Maybe that was just his way of giving a shout out to Richard Sherman's wife.

LUND: But what about all the field work I did?

Tim Marchman: