Little Rock: What, are you scared of a pair of scissors? It’s not like we threw paper or something.

Anyone who joins Queens Baseball Club is just Flushing money down the toilet.

I look forward to reading this message on my brow ser.

I’ve always thought football referees should wear black and white striped cummerbunds.

That looks like a guy who thinks his problems will all go away if he can just get One Ring.

Once cooler heads prevailed, the gentlemen agreed to disagree on whether This Love or Girls Like You had been the best part of Maroon 5's performance.

Jesus Christ. +1

+1

To be fair, his pest control results are still mixed at best. Catching one bat doesn't erase 70 years of getting clowned by that fucking road runner.

Magic Johnson should trade this entire pile of jetsam for Davis

Batshit days, ranked:

Ryan: You gotta put a hat on a hat!

Dad: Shit, what’s the name of that sportsball team Trent plays for? Boston ... [puts on hat] uh ... Badgers maybe? [puts on jacket, goes downstairs] Ok honey, I’m ready.

Six or seven kickers is a lot of kickers

“The guy in the Pat costume just got sent to the hospital by a Jets defensive back.”

The tricky thing about an octagon fight is there are eight sides to every story.

Browns Better Win! #bbw

Carson Palmer and Troy Polamalu were roommates at USC.

Caps Snatch Defeat From Jaws

That’s pretty great.