See? The Athletic isn’t the only place to get this kind of riveting analysis. 

This x 33 degrees. 

In case you haven’t been keeping track:

“Trail of Tears” gets you suspended.
“Chink in the armor” gets you fired.
Civil War-as-benign occurrence meme....totally fine. 

Tried it, too. That shit’s hard.

“I really just long for a return to the days when I could call people kikes or cripples or trannies or fags and people wouldn’t get so goddamned upset about it.”

As opposed to all the other level-headed, pragmatic conspiracy theorists out there. 

“See?!” -- Stephen A. Smith

Gruden actually DID bring in several key players on the 2002 Bucs team, so they were not all Dungy’s players.

“At least he stood for the goddamned Anthem.”

This is actually not a revelation. The beer shed story has been out there for years. 

Can I still kiss Carrie Underwood’s ass, though? ‘Cause I think I would enjoy that. 

“If Obama gets re-elected our country will have crossed the “tipping point” from being a free enterprise economy to a welfare state. I can state this so confidently because of the large National Debt.”

These things are always somewhat sad in real time but they’re truly gold in retrospect.

You didn’t defeat Obama.

Let me guess: today that guy is a two-term Congressman?

When churches start expelling people for being conservative, Greene will be closer to having a point.

“Last week, Karim Zidan wrote this important analysis of how Trump and the UFC reinforce each other.”

Do you REALLY need “a fresh, independent voice” if it’s one that can’t write?

That was all to distract you from the fact that Gus Johnson is a lazy, talentless hack who has always substituted bombast for actual preparation, because bombast is easier to do. Now he’s added superficial ABC Afterschool Special bullshit to his repertoire.

Is she the woman on Designated Survivor?

If she did, it wouldn’t (shouldn’t, maybe I’m giving her too much credit) be about DeGrom, who pitches in the opposite league from her husband.