If only there were a date on the calendar somewhat close to New Year’s Eve ... a day where no one had to work and had nothing better to do than sit around watching college football ...

Karl Malone says “hello.”

Oh yeah but ringz! Oh, wait ...

I haven’t seen someone enjoy this many Cardinal losses since Henry VIII.

That bat flip was the capstone to an insane inning of baseball, one in which everyone in my house, who had no rooting interest in the game, was on their fucking feet, losing their minds.

Nope, Sonics should have moved to Kansas City Power&Light district. You have football. Kansas has basketball. Enjoy your concussions and failing basketball team.

Just gonna remove some redundancy in your comment. Still gold though.

Having Tweeted this thought, Reilly went on to compare an OKC team with neither Durant nor Westbrook to Kate Upton with a double mastectomy.

So, following this analogy, what is Draymond Green? Kate Upton’s balls?

Yeah? Then why am I masturbating and trying to get the layering right in photoshop, smartass?

If the invaders somehow make it snow like a quarter inch, DC will self destruct all by itself.

I will never tire of this. In the fall, can Deadspin do it for the St. Louis Ra—

oof.

exactly. I want to see a skit where an ESPN talking head talks about a person (a woman?) who leaves a job for a pay raise, etc. I can see hilarious moments like how leaving makes her a whore and how she shows no loyalty to the company who was under paying her. Probably would be even funnier if it was a pro athlete…

I’m even more disappointed with Yankee fans than ever. How has this asshole not been shiv’d in the parking lot? Can we do a KickStarter to send him to a Dodgers game?

I wonder what terrible thing happened in his life that he gets that into catching baseballs. Theories:

Ill have a drink tonight to best coach of the last 50 years. Still wish i could have seem her coach an nba team.

“Not really sure what happened out there - I came out and played Cardinal Baseball, you know, we played “the right way” - and we still lost. Sad!”

The Magic Number for the Cubs is 78.

My two favorite teams are the Royals and whoever beats the Cardinals.

Major League teams: “we don’t condone this sort of thing.”