Please make it stop.

Mental Floss and Forbes! And Twitter, but that doesn’t count because it doesn’t pay my student loans.

NEVER

I stopped writing on my site (for free) because other sites asked me to write for them (for money). I write for Mental Floss and Forbes these days. It’s not the fiery rants and sarcasm of my erstwhile sub-blog, but it’s still the same good weather nerdiness.

o

I don’t see it.

I cussed a few times when I first started The Vane, but quickly found out that meteorologists are huge prudes that would make Pat Robertson seem like Bette Midler, and figured it’s not worth the constant battle and private scolding/lecturing.

This guy is nuts. He blocked me on Twitter last year after I wrote about him blaming his wife for stealing his phone and tweeting out his shirtless selfies. Terrible excuse. 1/10.

It’s extremely common for people to chew out (and threaten to kill) broadcast mets for interrupting Very Important Programming to warn them that tornadoes are on the ground, but breaking in for an all-clear is...questionable.

Boston is on its way to seeing the most snow they've ever recorded in one season, but Empire News' fake satire hoax bullshit said "entire country" and painted the "worst snowfall" from D.C. to NYC to beef up shares from gullible cityfolk. They'll probably do something similar with hurricanes now that summer is coming…

We have to deal with the same shit in weather, too. That being said, The Onion dies a little more for me every time one of my Facebook friends feels the need to say "THIS IS FROM THE ONION" whenever I post an article from The Onion.

I have never seen anyone lick a lollipop. Ever. The only time I've ever seen someone lick a lollipop was in music videos or commercials and it was not meant to be a lollipop that they were licking.

I went to South—people throwing things at you is a sign of affection.

Here are some more names: Keith Olbermann, Claire McKaskill, David Gregory, Christiane Amanpour, Arianna Huffington, Henry Kissinger, Eliot Spitzer, John Ratzenberger, and I swear I saw Nancy Pelosi in there.

Problems? What problems! Sing along now...fahoo fores, dahoo ignoressss...

I may or may not have rigged the results in seven of those states. [shifty eyes]

LITERALLY A U KNO WHAT

This is like some bullshit Mr. Krabs would pull.

tell them that the MSG prevents chemtrail infection and their heads will explode like that scene in scanners

Cool! I like it. Can't wait for the update to roll out gawkerverse-wide. This will help people escape my vertical more efficiently.