Unidentified Frying Objects.

Apologies for all caps, but WHY DOES ANYONE WANT OR NEED TO SEE BOB KRAFT GETTING A HANDJOB?! I CAN’T BELIEVE I’M ACTUALLY SAYING THIS, BUT I’M ON THE BILLIONAIRE’S SIDE ON THIS ONE! SHOW ME A HIDDEN CAMERA VIDEO OF A BILLIONAIRE PAYING HIS FAIR SHARE OF TAXES AND I’LL PAY ATTENTION!

As a Blazers fan, I appreciate the sentiment. Indeed it has been a fantastic series. But what the playoffs REALLY need is for someone besides the Warriors to win it all again. 

Yeah, and KD also got a bullshit call on his three point attempt just before that. The shitty calls went both ways.

This deserves the Pulitzer for sports writing. Except for fans of these respective teams, everyone is tired of the shadows cast over the league by its most inflated egos. I never thought the term snowflake would apply to some of the world’s brawniest men, but here we are. Whiny little bitches vying not to see who can…

Have there ever been two more insufferable teams than these? I hope the Rockets win because I’m sick of the Warriors and all the praise being heaped on KD, but good Lord, wouldn’t it be great if they could both lose?

Fernando Rodney? I think he’s probably fine, but were his parents fine? They really tested the limits of what’s reasonable when it comes to two-first-name names. Seems like maybe Pops had a few too many Red Bull coffees himself.

The Lakers most definitely would have made the playoffs if they hadn’t lost half their roster to injury. The Jazz on the other hand were at pretty much full strength all season. Secondly, I’m not sure which pundits you were looking at, but Sports Illustrated pegged the Jazz as the 6th best team in the LEAGUE, not the…

Good, keep believing Yang can’t win, and continue to suffer the consequences of lame Democratic candidates with tired ideas. If you’re not supporting Biden, then who are you in favor of that has any ideas beyond “Tax the billionaires” and “free college education for all”? Sanders and Warren look washed up compared to…

Seventeen of their final 24 games of the season were against sub-.500 teams and 13 of their games were at home. The Blazers, by comparison, had only 11 games against sub-.500 teams and 16 of their final 25 games were on the road. With that easy of a second half schedule, I think it’s safe to say the Jazz were riding…

As a Blazer fan specifically, and more generally as a fan of a less insanely competitive Western conference, I sincerely hope Westbrook continues to make great strides towards minimal self-improvement. 

If America elects this turd, it deserves every bad thing it gets as a result. With a candidate like Andrew Yang, who for the first time in recent memory actually has some radical and achievable and American-life-changing ideas, there’s no reason in hell this washed-up sandbag that rode in on Obama’s coattails should wi…

A lot of preseason analysis had the Jazz getting a top-four seed, with the Blazers possibly missing the playoffs. Having watched quite a few Jazz games this season, I fail to see what others apparently saw in them. Yes, Mitchell has the potential to be a perennial all-star, and having a 7-foot  center ain’t bad for…

Another argument for universal basic income. At $9/hr (before taxes), even a good driver would pull in something in the ballpark of $1200 at 40 hrs a week. Considering the nature of the job, I would guess most drivers rarely work 40 hrs/wk. Meaning most, if not all people, are doing this out of desperation. UBI…

The only reason this is even a discussion is because of the dramatic nature of the goal. If it had been called back in the 63rd minute, everyone would say that VAR had done its job. 

The fact that he called out all the ringchasers in the league tells you all you need to know about who he is as a player. There’s a slim chance he’ll ever get a ring, but he’ll have something much greater: a legacy, the respect of fans and teammates, and a city that will love him forever. 

I love how Ronaldo fans insist on his superiority over Messi because he has played in more leagues. As if Messi shredding English clubs every damn year is not evidence enough that he would’ve dominated that league, too. 

The Warriors are a cursed franchise? They’ve had the most bloated talent in the league for three seasons. As for Cousins, I’d like to say it couldn’t have happened to a nicer guy, but that would be false. Definitely some nicer guys than Boogie who have had bad things happen at inopportune times. And considering he…

I’m surprised they didn’t blame the refs. 

Call me old-fashioned, but I think it’s important for these kids to experience the heartbreak of awful officiating. It’ll prepare them for what’s to come in the NBA.