Little do you know that the real Scooter Gennett apotheosed right up to heaven on that fabled four home run day only to be replaced by some sort of changeling or homunculus in the husk of Scooter’s old body.

He might actually be this dude! From a Schoenfield ESPN piece today on the current breakout players this season:

The gender reveal for our first kid was about 12 seconds after he was born when he peed on the nurse that was holding him. I thought it was creative, especially for a newborn.

This wouldn’t have happened IF HE BROUGHT HIS GLOVE TO THE GAME!

Do they have to abort this one and start over? I don’t know the rules of this game.

I blame the pitcher. Throw it overhand like a man. This is baseball for Chrissakes.

I get that all the pink is for breast cancer and whatnot but on the Red Sox it just looks like they mixed their laundry and it bled like a motherfucker.

“Who the fuck is Pete Rose?”

You couldn’t bear to call Manny the Actaing Manager, Thompson?

Surprised it wasn’t a pile-up with the #44 Hillsdale College, the #65 Oral Roberts University, and the #45 Trump University cars.

I have a ten game ticket package for the Sox. I can’t tell you who won or loss the games I went to last season. I do remember I saw a guy named Brian Johnson pitch a CGSO, which lead to some AC/DC jokes. But that’s about it.

Baseball is reason to go out, hang with your friends, and relax. If they win, woo, if they…

What the fake news and liberal media won’t show you is that he drew 1st on the officer. Just an innocent groundhog? I think not. Wake up sheeple!

Could’ve saved the county a few thousands dollars by just letting it get run over by traffic like God intended.

Damn, it’s too bad the cops of Carroll County have to be law enforcement officers AND animal control agents. If only the county had a department of animal control that could be called in a situation such as this and ... hmm?.. They what now?

Well at least you get to wear them Monday through Thursday.

Needed a few more good guys with cornholes.

1. The tournament was right after Church (Contemporary Service, natch).

Looks like some people wore flip flops to a Crocs party, man.

H.R.C., eh? Every artist wants to sign their work. This is definitely a Soros-funded false flag operation to slander everyday God-loving Southern patriots.

Because this is the most exciting play in baseball, not the home run.