I like ketchup (in moderation, it can be fantastic!) but it’s pretty far down the list of things I crave on eggs. Some sort of hot sauce? Essential.

I reject your assertion regarding the need for ketchup to bespoil a fried egg sandwich, but I’m 100% on board with the rest of your platform.

The crash of the rubble

Do you keep yoga mats around as a snack?

Nice to see you back, even if it’s just a one-off.

And over just shy of 200 miles round-trip, I burned just a quarter of a tank of gasoline.

Found your missing lede image.

it’s bullshit to make the customer walk the clerk through the assembly process.

If you smoke the pork perfectly, it becomes lamb.

A BBQ pork sandwich, for example, does not need cheese

They’re fairly durable, although I’m sure you could crack one by dropping a big Dutch oven or something on the surface. I’ve used cast iron on them for years without issue. You’ll eventually see a bit of wear on the surface, but it takes a while. My folks have one that’s 15 years old & it still looks great. I’d trade…

Malt vinegar begs to differ.

Not even slightly. 

Glass top - no exposed individual elements.

No, not even then.

Full size spare tire, or TWO!

Move to Nebraska.

Replace “you” with “your lackeys” & that’s spot on.

This kills me as a librarian, imagine if I organized all the books by size?

I’m not convinced that the inexpensive pastry brushes (Winco, et al) found at restaurant stores are in any way different from the even cheaper china bristle/chip brushes available at Home Depot or any other hardware store.