Move to Nebraska.

Replace “you” with “your lackeys” & that’s spot on.

This kills me as a librarian, imagine if I organized all the books by size?

I’m not convinced that the inexpensive pastry brushes (Winco, et al) found at restaurant stores are in any way different from the even cheaper china bristle/chip brushes available at Home Depot or any other hardware store.

It’s sort of a hybrid powered by a mix of electricity and cereal or sushi or whatever you ate last.

I don’t think they’re supposed to fly, just drive, regardless of location.

I’m not a farmer (anymore)

The star is more for the cat than the rig, but it’s nice to see one used for a variety of things.

“now”?!

It sounds like you don’t actually enjoy pizza.

That’s generally the response he deserves.

Is this a new low? I can’t tell any more.

Pie > cake

It’s like having exotic pets, including birds. Red. Online dating. Flag.

Mix it with hot sauce & spray directly into those pesky kids’ faces.

Why does that make you angry?

https://jalopnik.com/hello-this-is-jalopnik-calling-about-your-cars-extende-1848734702

Tough titties 

She’s a complete moron. 

SonicRamone is a racist troll. There’s no good-faith commenting or engagement with that one.