“Here, take your precious boobs back!”

/rimshot

The weird thing is if you ranked the 100 best jellybeans being hit by a truck would probably come in at #50.

One of these days I want a hit batter to just calmly take his base, let the situation cool down, and then blindside rush the pitcher from the first base.

His over-inflated ego.

Can we just get an update of SimGolf, please?

Pfft, Vlad would’ve crushed that one for a stand-up double.

Be sure to come back once you’ve played the game and realize how dumb this comment was!

“OK sure, what’s the worst that could happen?”

Given how often the average guy seems to get kicked out of the bedroom for doing something stupid... it’s basically identical, isn’t it?

werewolves are normal ass dudes except one night a month they gotta sleep outside. it’s almost boring.

Isaiah Thomas Is Out For the Rest of the Playoffs

I’m an older chick

Damn, we’ll have to vacate all our Super Bowl wins.

For Mayweather’s sake, I don’t know why you even bothered to write anything down.

Bringing in Tony Romo to lose games in January? Now there’s a revolutionary concept!

What do you think is supposed to be funny about withholding a source? This is about ethics

He’s never been IN the black either.

However, by the strictest reading of that law, it would be illegal for your boss to make more than you or for there to be any privileges associated with higher positions. So.. every company is breaking that law.

When I clicked, I really thought the relief would come in the form of not having to cheer for Aroldis Chapman.