Yup, that’s what I said and felt. And still do. You, apparently lacking any real identity or personality other than “bike guy,” felt so personally slighted by this that you launched into this weird meltdown about how BIKING IS FUN AND YOU AREN’T GOOD ENOUGH FOR IT LALALALALALA I CAN’T HEAR YOU

You’ll notice that at no point did I, unprovoked, push my personal feelings and experiences on you or anyone else. I simply shared my own.

Sure, I can. I’ve never been tased or gotten food posioning that required hospitalization and I don’t have to in order to be fairly certain I wouldn’t consider them fun.

This is an article about a guy who doesn’t know how to ride learning.

ISIS is the 4chan of Islamic terrorist groups. There is no real guiding ideology. Their motto should be “because we can (for the LULZ).”

So you’re a hardcore biking enthusiast. You’re an outlier. Your opinion doesn’t really apply here.

To you.

Some people also hunt, go skydiving or collect stamps for fun. Fun is subjective.

Still have no idea what you’re on about, with or without a connection (?) to swimming.

Yup. I mean, there exist places where bikes are an acceptable (if impractical) method of personal transportation, but for the most part, they’re a thing you take to the park to ride in circles for a while. Nothing wrong with it, but I prefer a cheaper workout.

It’s also a great way to get hit by a car on roads with no shoulder or sidewalks and it’s fun to YOU.

I can swim with no problem.

I said I was too good to do it?

I never learned, either. Have no intention to, to be honest. I live in a sleepy suburban area, have a car and have no real need. It’d be like learning to calculate on an abacus when I have a smartphone.

You know who else has never been knocked out in back to back fights? Every single MMA fighter in history until they were.

Our kid, from the age of maybe 3 months, always took showers with my wife. She loved them and still does at 1 1/2. The one time we tried to put her in the tub, she screamed and cried non-stop. I dunno. Maybe she’s broken.

I had not heard that, to be fair.

Possible, though I haven’t seen much in the way of evidence that Camille is a sociopath.

You're projecting your experience onto someone else.

(Almost) Everyone needs companionship. If they didn’t, there’d be a shitload more lifetime bachelors and bachelorettes. I love my wife and wouldn’t trade her for anything, but there’s no doubt that dating and marriage complicates life in a way that’s equally infuriating and enjoyable.