“THEAHS NO TREASHUA! YOUAH FHACKING DELUSIONAL SPIDAHMAN!” 

There’s really not much of anything here. The headline and the beginning of the story made it sound like Erin from The Office was burning crosses and shit. Nope, she attended some corny debutante ball thing that has a racist past. Most of the US has a racist past.

Why does Hemsworth, the largest Chris, not simply eat the others?

I posted this story last year, but I was sort of late in my submission and it ended up buried about 5,000 comments down. Now, two days into the contest and there’s already 365 comments! Well, here’s hoping it gets seen this year.

Crisis on Infinite Christmases

Do you still enjoy an ice cream drumstick? Sounds like that was a significant Thanksgiving meal, marking the start of new & good things in your life!

I’M TIRED OF BEING THE ONLY RACING FAN AT DOORFLIESOPEN! GET OVER THERE SO I CAN FINALLY JUSTIFY MY LAWNMOWER RACING ARTICLE!

For any former deadspin readers/commenters:

If you are a deadspin refugee, come join us!

As the resident Cardinals fan at this Chicago office, I made bacon and pancakes for everyone this morning on the office griddle. I figured after the Cardinals spent all weekend fucking the Cubs, I should at least cook them breakfast.

*Richie Incognito throws his father’s arms up in disgust*

This is an unfair characterization, Shirley Temple went on to become Black later in life. 

You wrote all that, but I'd shut the door and closed the curtains one paragraph in.

The Sharks are in a really bad hole here.  It’s going to take everything in the referee’s power to bail them out the next two games.

Fun fact: “The Touching is, To Me, Off Limits,” was the original title of MC Hammer’s 1990 breakthrough single. 

Kinda buried the lede there. I’m pretty sure owning multiple Shih-Tzus is a big indicator that you have to watch Hallmark and Lifetime. Unavoidable.

Did they try looking for someone with a gigantic bald head?

i’m lucky enough to have PTO and took some yesterday (after the splinter purge but that’s another thread) to see if the neighbours needed any help and dropped off our ballots at city hall.

Already there. The problem is that all media components are answerable to their profits, not to providing the news to the people. See... they’ve figured out how to drive profit without providing practical utility. They create artificial conflicts they control for ratings. *looks up at GMG and Univision* This place…

Let’s rewind the clock to about 1980 or so. Reagan picks up the baton of an anti-government platform from Barry Goldwater, after Goldwater’s acolytes effectively assumed control of the GOP. What followed was a systematic expungement of anyone and everyone that didn’t toe the party line, ultimately leading to the…