I don’t even cry in the shower because I use baby shampoo, OKAY?!

I’ll do it....

He threw for 175 yards with three interceptions and lost a fumble

Next trade - David Carr to the Jaguars for a $250 gift card to PF Changs.

One fan couldn’t have put the feeling in the city better: “Woooo, baby! We’re going to the ... yes we are!”

It was a bad take even as it was born; even with a score to tie it up, it never felt anything like a close game.

A Mo-town* Philly Special.

Announcers: that player is classless!

Thankfully for those who hold things like a painted logo on a football field in such high regard, the grounds crew has since patched things up.

Think about how absolutely scummy the person who thought of this is. Then think about the people that agreed to be in it.

“What’s going to happen to ours husbands, our fathers, or our sons, when a white girls lies on them?”

Dennis Rodman, but only if he keeps his current brain

This is a weird way to tell us you drafted David Johnson first for your fantasy team.

‘Hah! That was the worst move he’s ever made.’” She laughed at the memory.

So you’re saying the gas and oil industry is backing a particular horse in this race?

“Why don’t they make the whole team out of Boban?” is the NBA equivalent of “Why don’t they make the whole plane out of the black box?”

Oh wow, that was cruel of him to corner teenage Stephanie instead a steel cage on Halloween.

What the fuck is the big deal? Like, yeah, it’s unfortunate, but it was an interrogation gone wrong. These things HAPPEN. Sometimes you start off asking someone some questions and before you know it you’ve accidentally dismembered them to death with a bonesaw. Who among us? Glass houses and stones people. (Also, if…

So the prevailing excuse for why Kaepernick was not offered a job was becasue he didn’t fit the system, meaning that there was no way they could have an athletic QB who could run backing up a pocket passer.