John Vandemoer sounds more like the title of a sailing coach than the name of a person. When he was born, his parents knew John Vandemoer would one day be the corrupt sailing coach of a prestigious private college.

I mean, sure, why not? It’s not like literal millions of people attend sporting events every year without getting in shouting matches with Russell Westbrook. Russ MUST be the problem.

“My son has the biggest legs. Just tremendous.”

The thing I loved about this story, is Keisel couldn’t help but tell on himself. People (dipshits in particular) seem to forget that professional athletes play at an incredibly elite level, with the most insane shit talkers on earth. These shit talkers are all programmed to spend every minute of the game trying to get…

Also, I don’t think Stephen A. Smith is lazy at all. He does two different shows like 4 or 5 times a week? Not including guest spots, columns, interviews and specials. I think he works hard as fuck.

“They had five different quarterbacks. They had Alex Smith, Josh Johnson, Mark Sanchez...Some guy named Peeboo Horshake. They had Count Chocula AND Frankenberry! Two times founding father Alexander Hamilton started and for three quarters Lin-Manuel Miranda filled in for him!
They had Mac of Mac and Me throwing three…

SOOOOO many insane things in this clip, but most insane? They call him “Senator Romney” in the fucking birthday song! How normal and cool!

Exactly! I imagine him hanging up the phone, cracking open a Bud Lite, putting on “Rudy” and being like, “Yeah....Yeeeeeeaaaaah, it could happen!”

I know this is horrible and awful and shows how tiered our society is and that “hard work and dedication will help you achieve” is bullshit....
BUUUUUT...
I fucking died at that dad who wanted his son to pretend to be a kicker. “He has really strong legs,” is the coolest dad sentence ever. 

All primaries should be on one day, with no more than 4 months to declare you’re running. Any fundraising, or declaration to announce you’re running before the 4 month time frame results in execution.

Friday Night Lights 2: Lights Out!

Friday Night Lights 2 is shaping up way differently than I expected.

I’m not here to bag on you sexually, but you could do well by watching every 2 Live Crew video available on youtube.
Thank me later. I’m here to help.

Everyone knows when you’re trying to win someone’s approval/business you let them win in golf, right?
I mean, everyone but Trump, of course.

That header is either him eating an invisible giant hamburger, or motorboating an invisible ass.

I don’t get how you can’t blame Magic Johnson for this. Yes, you have James but you also have a GM who’s a step away from “the rule book doesn’t say a dog CAN’T play basketball!”

“If you won’t be horridly racist fascists, someone else will!”
“okay....”

She’s also one of those shitty Christians who believe God agrees with everything they specifically do (but not shit other people do). This she never falters or sins and all her loses are lessons.

“If you were offended by this comment, we sincerely apologize.”

It seems odd until you remember Russia made this: