“Cool Ranch Doritos Loco Taco”

“Cheesecake gifs of Asian girls in celebration threads”

Roxanne! You don’t have to put on that red hat.

Is this real life?

For food we had: Steak. Burgers. Bar-b-que. Pizza. Beer. Soda. Milkshakes. Mari-fucking-juana. A DJ. Ice cream cake.

Rolled my eyes so hard I saw my own brain.

Agreed, I’d suggest going to the liqour store for all your early morning drug cravings. 

I honest to God have no idea who you’re arguing with right now.

Maybe he could get the Van Buren Boys to kick the shit out of Doug Gottlieb ? I’d pay to see it

What about marine biology?  

“Architecture really seems like the only choice “ George Costanza 

They’ve got maybe three-quarters of a first half of a season before they start losing four fifths of their games. Big Poppa Pump said it best.

Jesus Christ, Laura! The body isn’t even cold yet!

Mickey Rourke is not fucking having it.

You should take the midnight train going anywhere...

That’s interesting. If I’m doing this right, it claims that it only only takes a few minutes to get a can of beer dropped in a cooler of ice-water mix to get to point of ice cold temp. That seems fast to me based on anecdotal evidence, so I may be forced to run two or three experiments to see if this is valid. Maybe…

Frankly speaking, it’s a lot easier to mispronounce ‘decked’ than it is to correctly pronounce ‘Spero Dedes’.

The true Wentz is more nuanced and complicated, with sources describing him as “selfish,” “uncompromising,” “egotistical,” one who plays “favorites” and doesn’t like to be “questioned,” one who needs to “practice what he preaches” and fails “to take accountability.”

Refrigerator bear goes for the purple stuff.

Ray Ratto thinks every time a team wants a play reviewed, it should have to pay $1 million in cash on the spot to a local charity, or take the call it got and shut up about it.