The only way this corruption story could get better is if the FBI pinned the Zodiac murders on Grayson Allen.

I will use only the finest butters and oils.

It may well be. Delirious from waiting so long, then delirious from last year. Also quick reading at work before someone looks over my shoulder and says, “ Hey that ain’t the report on illegal voters”

“By the way, fuck “The Living Years.” I remain firmly against any rock song that uses a child’s chorus.”

You can’t see me!

Mike Matheny then immediately ordered his pitcher to bean the next nacho vendor he could find. The plan backfired on Matheny when he realized he just created loaded nachos instead.

“So we were drinking one night....” or “You know the signs at the zoo that say don’t feed the animals?”

I absolutely loved the people on Twitter saying ‘you’ve got to respect the president’ or ‘you can’t call the president a bum’ to Lebron less than a day after the president called black athletes sons of bitches.

I heard the practice of Isaac Yankem, DDS went up in flames.

Iggy and Klay*

Pitching a fit and throwing stuff across the house is peak Dadspin. I approve. (And do the same.)

this is a bad take. College football is popular in LA and Austin. Washington sells out their home games right now in super-active and interesting Seattle. College football is also insanely popular in Florida, where everyone is within 2 miles of a nice beach. College football is popular not just because of Alabama and…

I’m pretty sure the whole ‘Pluto: Planet or No?’ debate has led us to where we are today. It used to be that there were basic facts everyone agreed on. My Very Educated Mother Just Served Us Nine Pizzas. It was easy, there are nine planets, planets are cool, space is cool, we’re all on the same page. There aren’t a…

I’m with you, but what was the Bushwhackers stereotype? I’ve never heard someone say, “typical New Zealander, always pumping their arms when they walk and licking people’s heads!”

If you wanna find hell with me, this movie will show you what’s it’s like.

You’d be surprised what can transpire when you show up at a fitness center and announce, “I’m here to fix the cable.”

Dude, you are a professional athlete who made a self-centered move to grab a championship and a bigger market for your brand. Stop fighting people on Twitter who call you out on it as if it’s not true and go jump into your Scrooge McDuck pool of money.

Magic powers that kill lupus, you say?

For that, you need Orig3n’s 3lit3 package.