There’s a reason rich people stay rich, and poor people stay poor.

And that was before they were each given a license to steal.

2 words.

This is just going to lead to a bunch of maintenance workers shiving each other.

I use blank 3X5 file cards.

If the roads are icy my WiFi had better be working.

If Leslie Moonves ran ABC Julie Chen would be on The View.

The ocean’s that way, buddy.

Chinese Sleeper Agent?

Looks like they’re going to be in the market for some new hotels......

Yeah, like Bob isn’t going to rat everyone out for a better parking space.

I think the blame here goes squarely on everyone who voted for Marilu Henner.

Ugh.

This is great, but I’m still waiting for my damn package.

They sell more now when people think they dispense Viagra.

Call them Trump-35's.

This is why we need arenas and hungry lions.

Dude, it’s Arthur C. Clarke.

Yet, oh God, there were so many stars you could have used. What was the need to give these people to the fire, that the symbol of their passing might shine above Bethlehem?