“Wait, who? When did we talk about that? I’m not trying to get out of it, I’m just... ok no need to get mad... ok fine I’ll go get changed.” Even thinking about it puts a pit in my stomach.

Gut reaction was, “Is that Marcelo?” This statute is butt.

When I see a story like this break and The Root does a write-up, I say to myself, “Man, I sure hope Michael does this one.” And you, sir, never disappoint. That being said, I actually thought you wrote the law firm’s statement in a satirical manner to further show how absurd this whole thing is. When I realized it was…

Pepsi > Coca-Cola. Fight me.

You are not alone! Now, admittedly, I’m probably a lot worse in that I know I never go to the movies or have time to watch all of the new shows, so I will just read the Wiki plot summary for all of the new movies/shows and then decide if I want to watch them. That includes the major ones from the last few years…

I’m not usually one to read an article on any sports blog/website and think about how well it was written over just the actual content, but, seriously... wow. Excellent writing here, I could read your pieces all day.

My thoughts exactly, just needs way less punctuation and mentions of a mysterious person associated with the law. Like, say, the “judge” or “constable.”

“Chlamydia... I think I’ll name my daughter that.”

What a respectful, measured response to this comment. Is this still the internet? Am I lost?

Everyone. Do yourselves a favor and listen to that announcer on the Twitter video during the highlights. I couldn’t stop smiling, he just makes life better. Also, Cox got some biggy ups!

His last name is Conte and there’s not a single PED joke made anywhere in the comments. I’ve never been so disappointed in the Deadspin comment section :(

I don’t know how I missed this, but you just made my day. Thank you.

Just started listening to American Scandal on Spotify. Would not have understood this reference prior to 12 hours ago. You get all the props.

What’s just cripplingly annoying (among a million other things) is that Donj’s intention was to try and catch CNN in a lie, but when it was pointed out that the picture he took at face value wasn’t what he originally thought, he then backpedals furiously into “dude it’s just a meme but y’all are still liars.”…

I know this is sarcasm, but I still winced. Brilliant.

Omg, the pettiness from Courtney... give me all of the pettiness... inject it directly into my veins.

Omg, the pettiness from Courtney... give me all of the pettiness... inject it directly into my veins.

I find it sad you even have to add the “/s” but it’s unfortunately necessary :(

Still my favorite drop on The Ticket #IWantMeSomeGloryHole

Hey, I can make up exact and agreed upon definitions for negative words that perfectly describe Republican politicians, too. Next you’re going to say something crazy like his being described as a sycophant for Trump means that he is “a person who acts osequiously toward someone important in order to gain advantage.”

Still a better love story than twilight.