Wait, The Rock?!? The Nicolas Cage movie?!?

What about it?

It's a movie that's only tangentially related to prisons! Alcatraz was just the fucking location, dipshit!

You're telling me that the overarching narrative of the Military Industrial Complex running roughshod over soldiers' lives and those soldiers feeling they…

I really want to know this asshole's opinion on the lack of women in the following shows:

- Escape from Alcatraz
- Shawshank Redemption
- The Green Mile
- Oz
- The Rock

Corporations are to people
as
Hot felons are to models

What the fuck, people?

#takebackyourcuntry

I can't remember the last time I was this disappointed by a game in, oh, ever. Thank Christ I stuck to my "No More Preorder" policy for this generation.

Played it for 2 hours one night, another hour the next night, said "Fuck it", and put GTA V back in.

I'm just going to leave this here ...

I'm sorry but I don't speak Hogwarts.

This is America, damnit.

"Americans are the Jews and the illegal aliens and their supporters are the Nazis."

Isha, this is a great, nay, THE GREATEST sentence in the history of the United States.

At once it's filled with all the pathos, fear, ignorance, irony, and non-reflective naval gazing that it is a veritable supernova of stupidity. If…

Man, I just ... wut ... you are going to die alone.

Keep what you have. Or keep what you kill.

Whatever.

Go here.

Point: Part of being a celebrity is being asked the same dumb questions again and again.

Counterpoint: Part of being a reporter is not being a rote dipshit.

- nevermind -

I remember when they used to call me "Vain".

Now I'm a "spornosexual"?!?

Nobody got time for 4 syllables and some bullshit.

(this is the perfect response, btw)

Dad, I don't think I'm going to do Hamster Style anymore.

Mark,

I don't think we can be friends anymore.

And I bid you good day and goodbye.

Save Money. Live Better. Masturbate on Whatever.