I was told by a good friend in the ad biz that the Viagra ads were marketed to men and the Cialis ads were marketed to women.

Careful with that joke, it's an antique!

You're only familiar with one sort of British accent. There are others which make everything sound like you're strangling a Sumatran tiger. [Don't strangle a Sumatran tiger. There are hardly any of them left.]

So you're a lucky SOB who came here to rub it in my face, is that it?

Brilliant. South Park is so great.

You've missed the whole point of sleeping with married women: She's already married so you can't get tied down by anything.

She doesn't have to tell you that you're the backup. And don't bring your feelings in to it, dude. This is about her needs. Your feelings, should you have any, don't enter into it.

Dude, you should not be doing this. You're reading Jezebel, so, you know, enter at own risk and all that. Besides, what response are you hoping for? 'Cause I'm pretty sure what you'll get has something to do with "male tears" and a several dozen misandry gifs.

American Dad did an episode about this. It ended in bloodshed.

Darn Young Adults with their novels and movies and complicated shoes...

The film is set in the future, when emotions are a thing of the past and a new breed of humans called Equals live in harmony.

I predict this will be the first and last time Gawker believes the cops.

I've never seen the show, but I don't know why people get so upset about TV shows they don't like. If you don't like it, don't watch it. If you don't watch it, what are you complaining about?

My gay friends have complained about drunk [straight] females ruining their bars. But I would assume anyone who is drunk should fit in just fine at a frat.

This is how Russia should settle its differences with Ukraine.

I don't like using the same doorknobs as strangers. Why on earth would I want to "cuddle" with them? I have a golden retriever. If you want to cuddle, you can't do better than that.

If you're Buc'd, you're fuc'd.

In general, NFL running backs peak at 26 and their prime is 25-28,29. Even among running backs who rush for over 5000 yards in the NFL, which isn't many, most are not very productive by the time they are 30. This happens even to the best, such as LaDainian Tomlinson, who was not a good player at 30. He never rushed…

His cap value will be $15.4 million in 2015, but the Vikings will only pay out $13 million in cash. $250K of that is a workout bonus. Peterson will be cut after this season unless he agrees to a new contract that substantially reduces his cap value.