Let’s be real y’all. The reason we didn’t think it was Benicio Del Toro playing the Collector this time was because we could actually understand what the fuck he was saying. Whatever he’s doing in the live-action is gibberish.

He did get Mary Sue’d a little bit. 

You ever fucking planning on acknowledging that they switched the Captain America thing back? 

Yes. Now shut up

I for one do not care about the Queen’s anus

Stillwell should have been beaten very hard by someone who knew how to beat a child very hard.

She also didn’t get along with Richard Gere or Shirley MacLaine.

I’m going to quote my Raylan Givens:

“You run into an asshole in the morning, then bad luck, you ran into an asshole. You run into assholes all day? You’re the asshole.”

Except.... Madonna was good in this movie. She gave a good performance and it is easily her best movie.

Debra Winger seems like a lot. 

What’s stopping you?

The fuck Bersanti at to answer for this?

Whatever it is you’re overcompensating for, I sure hope whoever you did it to is getting the help they need.

God, I hope not. Failure is so depressing to watch.

My Own Worst Enemy should have worked a lot better than it did. I enjoyed it. 

Just in case no one else tells you -- None of this shit was funny.

You know who else hasn’t commented about the ScarJo thing?

Chris Evans, Robert Downey Jr., Jeremy Renner, Chris Hemsworth, Tom Hiddleston, Paul Bettany, Mark Ruffalo, Sebastian Stan, Benedict Cumberbatch, Tom Holland, Paul Rudd, Chris Pratt, Dave Bautista, Bradley Cooper or Vin Diesel.

Have they even been asked?

That’ll wait until she gets cast as the female lead in the Damage Control Disney+ series. 

But people like me do. And I say he was wrong.

I’ve yet to see the story about it changing back. 

Do you have a dream world where he says: “Scarlett is right. Donald Duck should be mowing her lawn when this is over” or conversely, “Shut up, Tits McGee. Be glad your little movie at all.”

They switched it back. Everyone adjust their outrage boners from “black man gets wronged” to “woman gets wronged.”

All adjusted? 1...2...3