“My question is in 22 parts and might take quite a while. Perhaps you might like to sit and have some water while I ask it.”

Did I just hear Nail Cavuto say that compared to the Republican debate, the Democrats were “pathetic” debaters? ......?!?!?!

Fuck yeah! They probably know some blacksmiths too.

Sadly, I genuinely, genuinely believe Scott Walker thought he’d be president. Or VP.

We need you here to help us conquer the hell hordes, though.

Accountability starts somewhere.

If you don’t blame anyone in particular, then everyone can just shrug and say, “Well, ain’t that a shame. Whoever’s doing that should probably stop. Wink-wink, nudge-nudge, say no more, say no more” and carry on not fucking paying them.

I feel like I would also set aside my general opposition to serial killers when it comes to Jessica Fletcher... I mean, even if she was, she’d still be nicer than my grandma from my dad’s side was...

This douchenozzle runs on a CONSERVATIVE ticket. What about this is conservative? Do I not grasp the actual definition of conservative? I live in his god-damned state, making less than $20,000 a YEAR and struggling to make it day to day and he gets to spend $6.5 MILLION DOLLARS in 70 days? Gee, I wonder what $6.5…

Love Schumer. Hate Autoplay.

No one would, including Amy Schumer.

I wouldn’t give up any of the love I was in in my 20s just because it’s stupid when looked at through the lens of rationality or knowing humor.

Me: “I want to go see Angela Lansbury’s one woman play.”

I tip my tea cup to you, Ms. Lansbury.

Shout out to Jessica Fletcher for surviving while thriving in the most dangerous town on Earth... Cabot Cove!!!

Bobby, let me know when you start your cult. Cuz I’m THERE.

I’m actually cheering for Wales or Ireland to win it!

MOIST!!! (am I first?)

Was just reading about this on Guardian. It speaks volumes on what incarcerated people can do when given an actual chance.