Well, if we're doing running jokes: he can be two things.

The article author gets to decide? But…but what does this mean for our insufferable running joke that Sean O'Neal is a former cast member of Clarissa Explains It All?

LONG LIVE THE NEW FLESH.

Some day, if you're very lucky, somebody may love you as much as Teti loves The Price Is Right.

Ewoks! Ewoks in the trees!

I grew up in that same lull period as Erik, and my first encounter with Star Wars was when I got the old Return of the Jedi novelisation (With 8 Pages of Fabulous Colour!) from a secondhand book stall. As a kid, I guess you're used to some cultural things being over your head, so I don't think jumping in at the third…

…

I REMAIN QUIETLY HYSTERICAL.

I for one welcome our new moderator overlords. I'd like to remind them that as a trusted commenter, I can be helpful in rounding up others to toil in their underground upvote caves.

In the old, better days of TV show naming conventions, this would have been the story of Detective Jimmy Nein and his ethnically diverse partners, Juan and Wan. Together, they fight crime.

Only as a metaphor for Kinja. Sorry, I don't make the rules.

Appropriately, the top story on Lifehacker right now is 'Mental Tricks to Prepare for Dealing with Unpleasant People'. Let's see if there's anything there applicable to comment systems…

Whaaaat? How are our pun threads supposed to get increasingly strained and tenuous?

I mean, they say it's better at keeping out spam, but half the reason I come here is to learn how Google is paying $97/hour for work from home I couldnt believe it.

Tom Jones.

I call them face-blankets, but the dictionary people won't return my calls.

Yo, you should peep this totally l33t haxxing tool. Word on the cyberstreet is that Matthew Lillard uses it!

Contracting brownscale.

Hey! No spoilers about Jon Snow's parentage for non-book readers, please. They don't know about all the theories of him being the secret son of Omo n'Oba n'Edo Uku Akpolokpolo, Akenzua II.

And nobody needs to see those 'research' emails the HBO CEO of Tits keeps sending around. Any other job, HR would have been involved long ago.