Well, I’m glad I didn’t take that guy in my survival pool this week.

Oh cum all ye faithful.

Frankly I am glad Serena got knocked out not because I dislike her(she is an amazing athlete probably the best woman in the sport ever), but because her fan base was getting ridiculous to the point where every other woman in the sport was called second rate and balked at by her supporters.

Congratulations, Roberta Vinci!!!

Pictured: 11 little piggies

Why Your Team Sucks 2015: Apple

No doubt, the single greatest thing ever associated with Deadspin. Take a victory lap, internet.

I had to retire my jack sock years ago.

Easily the shortest sentence Pacman’s completed.

“I agree, mayo is tasty”

-Emmitt Smith

Take your record and your dumb shirt and cut your losses.

My mom was the same way, cept w/ Cocaine.

The last thing running through his head was probably a concrete floor.

We were a few sections over and watched them do cpr for 10 minutes. I immediately said, great A-rod just killed a guy. Almost simultaneously my wife slapped me for being insensitive.

What she meant was “Stick to sports as long as the people talking sports support my own fundamentalist narrow minded bigoted political ideology”

“Stick to sports.”

“Those bastards in Bristol are ruining everything,” Palin continued. “I’ll be babysitting every weekend ‘til I’m fucking 75 years old at this rate.”

“Now...where was I on the ESPN thing....oh right, Curt Schilling...”

their tuition will be covered by James’ foundation and the university starting in 2021, when the current seventh graders in the program graduate high school

Normally with the Mets, it’s a dead canary.