To white people, every group that they’re not part of is a monolith, but every white person is an island.

It’s amazing how Oscar Mayer has managed to get their name so associated with hot dogs because their hot dogs are absolutely terrible.

I remember reading that we’ve associated the flavor of cinnamon so strongly with apple pie that the combination of cinnamon + tartness = apples in our minds.

Dr. Tingle is the hero we need right now.

Will they break after ten minutes?

1) Trix’ “fruity shapes” are not original. When I was a kid and had to go uphill both ways to get my cereal, they were just a bunch of colored spheres. They tasted different, sure, but they were just spheres.

Is this the mofo that went and cleaned his car to get all the blood off because he knew he didn’t hit a deer? Or was that some other overprivileged fucknut who tried to get away with a hit-and-run... um... last week?

I realize that “traumatic” in this case just means “caused by trauma” but I can’t get past “mild traumatic brain injury”.

Didn’t Jones Soda make one of those? It seems like their kind of thing.

I expected them to be US size 37, so no,they are not what I would expect.

I live in constant confusion as to how “making love” went from “flirty talk” to “fucking” in like maybe two generations.

Lemonade needs to be strong and sour. I usually go for Newman’s Own if I buy it, or Snapple if I can find it, but otherwise I make my own, which I learned from a local Cuban restaurant:

They do think that, but then go on to think that they are ‘owed’ sex from attractive women because reasons, and get mad because it is obviously the women’s fault for not seeing how wonderful he is, etc.

Obviously, she got her ID card mixed up with President Obama’s. I mean, it could happen to anyone.

Did not watch, because “Christ, Article A Video”, but cold ketchup is a terrible terrible thing and should feel terrible, so I hope this video does not recommend it.

Fall is often a time for new beginnings, like the start of a school year. The food is better, because not only can one make soups and stews and braises without wanting to die in the heat, one wants to make those things. Fall means snuggling under a blanket.

Seconded. The only “supreme” thing about this people is that they come with extra cheese and mayo.

“Tell me this: what’s ‘fun’ about eating less candy? Maybe if you gave me an entire bag of them it would be fun. The only ‘fun’ I’m going to have with this thing is smearing it all over your door when I leave.”

And now that man is President.

They totally were. SO MANY guys think they have a magic dick. Or a magic duck, which is what I typed first, and which is honestly more likely to appeal to a lesbian.