Just pay your damn parking ticket.

Now I'm not only confused but also ashamed of my ignorance of pop culture.

What is a 'sexual investigation'? I feel like we're missing some words.

How about a trigger warning?

She would still be a realistic example of extreme weight loss in a properly fitted blouse.

I'm a different asshole.

Who cares? The people who make money off her story, that's who cares. Don't like it? Start your own magazine.

Oh, FFS. She looks like she has an alien egg sac on her in that picture. Quit being such a princess and put a damn shirt on.

Who the fuck cares how many Jewish kids are in the school district? If this had happened when I was a kid these teachers would have had their asses kicked by WWII veterans, including my father.

This is what the next two years until everyone discovers she really is unelectable are going to be like, isn't it?

Actors are hired for their looks, not their brains.

What's she selling now?

They did, their implementation just sucks.

I like the fact that it has mostly eliminated the two tiered commenting system.

The writers who read and participate in the comments make me like the new Kinja. The ones who don't, not so much.

I'm very confused by the headline.

When you're Madge's age, I don't think 'mummy' is necessarily the look you should be shooting for.

Good, something to keep the cat people docile.

I want Rihanna to grab my ass.

What percentage did they tip?