You’ve got it all wrong. Fake news!

Trump:

At the next campaign rally: “The Democrat babies made such a big deal about a little toilet tissue stuck to my shoe! Such a big issue. Well I’ve stopped wiping my ass, so the joke’s on them, folks! The joke’s on them.”

No one in the Secret Service said anything because they are the ones who stuck the toilet paper to his shoe. His LEFT shoe. It’s a message.

He makes Chris Christie “clean the Jersey turnpike” for him.

Are we sure that’s regular toilet paper and not the Constitution with which he usually wipes his ass?

That’s a very small piece of toilet paper for such a large piece of shit.

I find it hard to believe that trump is actually capable of wiping his own ass.

And yet it’s the least embarrassing thing he’s done as President.

Oh wow, how pretty. *clears throat* Sorry, I reverted to a 5 year old for a second there.

Oh, please god let this be real. If it is, I wouldn’t be surprised if the same sheet of TP is stuck to his shoe tomorrow.

Orrin you glad he'll be dead soon?

Maudeofthunder agrees.

I want the real Bea Arthur to come back as a zombie on our side , and kick every one of the malignant, narcissistic, assholes right in the nuts on camera. LOOK OUT.....Here comes MAUDE!!!

Wasn’t his old helicopter pilot a cocaine trafficker?

They know white woman vote republican no matter what so why should they care about a few women who yell at them and can’t do anything?

Do these guys not know that women can vote?

I drank five cans of Diet Dr. Pepper today and I don’t feel great!

Yep. Every day. Into the void.

BaeArthur to Orin Hatch: Fuck you.