I guess you need to decide whether you prefer a living shitstorm tornado to a creepy, dead-eyed fundamentalist replicant.

(Grits teeth) I strongly believe it is wrong to wish death on another person, and Donald Trump very nearly meets the technical definition of ‘person’.

He is also showing the GOP to be an irredeemable pack of hypocrites, ripping open fissures between the pro-rich/pro-racism arms of the party and forcing moderates into the arms of the Democrats. Not to say it isn’t bad. It’s terrible, but it’s not all bad.

Uh... they removed those bushes weeks ago.

Mr. Glitch! We heard the news and came as soon as we could. Is it true? Have you finally found... the Chosen One?

Now how can we work this wonderful black magic on admitted sexual assaulter Donald Trump? Because if he had a Weinstein-style collapse resulting in public repudiation, then the last nine months will have almost been worth it! Almost.

I hold out a faint hope that some of them are merely astonishingly ignorant, not contemptibly evil. I’m an optimist!

Nah, Trump fucked you.

Uh... what do I still have from back then? Oh wow, The Order of the Phoenix! I totally never finished reading that one too!

They should have used Anarky instead of Joker. Anarky’s already kind of heroic and Joker’s character would not be altered.

My cactus just died. Cripes, were you pointing in my direction when you said that?!?

They’ll play the Harry Potter theme and then Daniel Radcliffe will come out and kill them both.

Jesus, we don’t need to know how the mutton was prepared, G.R.R.!

No! Every time you clap your hands they asexually multiply!

It really doesn’t seem like he’s having very much fun. Lying is probably just a cover for his remarkable ignorance.

Also a nincompoop, a dithering dunce, an irksome tomfool, mendacious muttonhead and a catastrophically complete cretin.

“We are all born ignorant, but one must work hard to remain stupid.”

His fingers look like newborn gerbils.

YOU! IT WAS YOU ALL ALONG!

Presidents don’t need to know what they’re talking about any more. Apparently.