Now that the NFL knows the real victim of Ballghazi is women they've stop investigating it.

God is a capricious, power-hungry jerk who lives vicariously through his only son, what makes you think he *wouldn't* watch the NFL

11 out of the 12 balls they supplied were underinflated

WHAT?! How am I supposed to explain that to my children!? Jesus. I mean really, a black president? Wow.

Met a girl with "MOB" there. Was informed this stands for Money Over Bitches. Sure, why not

How long would it take you to explain the game of football to an alien? Was your mother a prostitute? What price bananas?

Probably the worst insult I could give Craggs is that I like him.

It's not a flag as long as you do it from the front.

"Hi, Mr Gronkowski, my name is Bob Markelson, I'm here for the interview?"

I wasn't the first but my goal is to be the last person to ever comment on Deadspin. Some 20 years from now, I'll comment on Samer Kalaf-Swift's nuclear doomsday post with a lousy "Shake It Off" reference

If you look at the defender's body language after the play he seems to admit that it was pass interference, which marks the first time a Hitchens ever agreed that there was evidence of something controversial.

Chip Kelly trying to finish a five-year contract in only two just shows his commitment to tempo.

Since when?!

Whatever, this is just like last year, and the year before that. Really I hate how every year we go through the same stupid debate about how Odell Beckham Jr didn't make the Pro Bowl.

"I don't know what to do with good black people"

The thrust of the article is that Tuohy walked up to and interrogated two black kids who were doing nothing but sitting at a table (and being black)...which is racist.

Well, it certainly is aswell.

The rest of the Lakers continued to wear the shirts for the duration of the game and scored a combined 4 points on 6 shots.

But Sanchez is kind of damned if he does, damned if he doesn't.

"The 6-76ers" has a nice ring to it