So my mom took me out to a nice breakfast before the court date because she felt awful for me and no doubt toked it up in her college days.

That's just gravity.

This would never happen at Temple, because at Temple, all three suspects would have been shot by a 14-year-old upon exiting the apartment building.

Pash appeared on Mike and Mike this morning to do a little management dick twirling.

Not a sport.

A Compendium Of Horrible, Horrible Twitter Poetry

She had manhands. And dudedick.

@TheEasyButton: Lookit the fangs, man!

I can't wait for the afterelton.com post tomorrow ripping you for including "pretty boy" among your list of insults, as if "prettiness" is some kind of homo/hetero-gender-related insult in the hyper-masculine athletic setting mass media and the athletes themselves have created, the same environment that produced the…

9.) Future Republican presidential nominee

Even Though He Didn't Kill His Wife And A Waiter

There's no dieting in baseball!

It's settling a debate that shouldn't exist.

-When I told him I could drive, he just about lost his mind.

Steve Blake just wants a hug.

The fuck you say about Danielle, bitch? "Ashley"?? Fuck Ashley! Danielle's the shit.

Who would have imagined that a Blackhawks player would somehow find his way into an even more offensive naming dilemma?

What is he doing here? And why isn't he wearing his elf clothes?

@ArkansasFred: That's just silly. Everyone knows Jesus was in it for the chicks.

This was written by a basketball student in my freshman business class at North Carolina State University