“CONSEQUENCES, MOTHERFUCKER.”

The thing that I like best about David Roth writing about Trump is that he writes it at such a level that, if Trump were ever actually arsed to read it, he could not possibly comprehend it. Unlike the Boaster-in-Chief, David really does have the best words.

Dear Deadspin’s overlords:

TO G/O MEDIA: I’m a person who fits right smack dab in the middle of the most coveted advertising demo. This post is indicative of the content I have most enjoyed from this site over the past 10 years that I’ve been a regular visitor. Please allow your very talented writers to continue doing this sort of work, and I…

Can you let me know when you will be returning to sports coverage so I can go back to checking in once or twice per day? I have a lot to do today at work and all of these posts about non-sports topics are distracting because I Must Read Every Single One of Them. Whereas with the sports stuff I really only care if its…

I watched the whole press conference Sunday and it perfectly demonstrated this. He is a gaffe-prone moron. And then the political shows tried to suss out ‘what he meant’ and what any of this means. The answer is NOTHING! He is that stupid and he is unable to have any meaning beyond “I am great, I do great things!”

This article is very good. If your bosses ever shut you down I do hope you and some departed Deadspin and Gawker writers will set up some sort of worker-led site funded through subscriptions or Patreon or something. I would pay $15 a month or so to read your columns, which I have to imagine is more than my page views…

This is all wonderful poetry.

This whole thing is a delight, as always, but “buttery germaphobe” is somehow even better than the 800 other amazing descriptions Roth has run through over the years, and again, I don’t know how he’ll top it (but he will).

David, I wish to register a complaint. You’ve filed this story to Politics, but this is erroneous, as this is clearly a Sports Story.

You guys are awesome. It is not hyperbole to say that this site often gets me through the day. Keep up the good work, and for the love of god do not stick to sports.

Rose is just seeking her 15 of fame.

the only cruise i would ever do is a viking river cruise. this is because their ads before PBS Masterpiece always made me want to be an elegant retiree gliding along the rhone with my aging but still dashing lawyer husband while taking in the sights of ancient europe, but also because it’s a river so if the boat…

You okay there buddy? I don’t see anyone but you saying this guy is acting like he’s fighting for world peace. He’s pointing out that he owes some of his success to his girlfriend and you’re losing your shit over it. Maybe have a nice lie down.

He’s saying people should get credit for the work they do. Maybe chill on the manufactured outrage there, buddy.

oh please. the british public is JUST AS racist as the american public. it might be less visible to some, or using different terminology, or targeting some groups more than others, but it’s still racist as fuck.

SECURE THE BORDER (collie)

Melania on that world leader thirst. She out here trying to trade in a ‘96 LeBaron with a broken soft top for a brand new Model 3. Girl, good luck with that everybody knows your credit is shit and you ain’t got no job. Be Best.

Melania Trump is an awful person.