Listen up Scott Stewart it sounds like your local school district had some failings and did not require you to attend a class titled “Addressing Your Elders” or a class titled “Health” because you are the one who does not know what a period is and unfortunately as an educator of some 37 years I feel an overwhelming…

They’re giving out practice squad trophies in Miami no wonder the team is bad at football they’ve been coddled and hugged and told they were special by their handlers and personal assistants in my day the only personal assistant a quarterback had was his conscience and if any scrub player picked him off in practice,…

I guess you need to look at the SORE board because there’s a right way and a wrong way to play the game and even though winning is everything it is still important to have some class and decency in this world I bet you think it’s great when basketball players try to slam dunk on one another’s faces and you think the…

@CHIDSPIN

He thinks he’s setting a good example and being a good role model but the greatest Yankee of them all was Mickey Mantle, and The Mick never would have gone to rehab.

I was teaching them how to read and RIGHT which means playing the game the RIGHT way not playing the game the hot dogging pants-dragging way these kids today play the game with their smartphones and their grinder dot com they can go to whenever they feel sad that they didn’t get a participation trophy in my literature…

Tell me about it, stud.

Just like the blessed Virgin Mary all I need is one period to make my point and in my case my point was that showboating and tomfoolery are the REAL racists and in her case her point was here’s the son of the creator coming in hot so be prepared like Scar said in the Lion King and in both cases all I got to say is If…

I don’t give a good goddamn what your diction is doing nobody wants to hear it in these public forms.

Last time I checked excessive celebration is a penalty in the National Football League act like you been there before Clay Matthews, you’re a role model for children everywhere and you are acting like you never been there before and the little Millennials are eating it up I worked in the school system for thirty seven…

Leather seats make noise sure, but when you run the BIG show, you do whatever you please and the khakis are large and his to fill, so I say CONNECT FOUR, coach Tomaselli.

Who are you to believe? The man with the pants on fire and nobody likes him? Thusly the landscape of proBASKETBALL changed forevermore. Old media meet NEW media. This Deadspin made me laugh. It’s a good Deadspin.

What would you do if your best Twitter friends were owning you so bad about your personal hygiene being terrible and you being a medicine ball-shaped semi-human who likes bad things and makes terrible jokes?

I think you meant to say slip on the wrist “isn’t even a GIRTHABLE Didion.” Something that is girthable carries significant weight, you see. A Didion is an expression or saying used by the upper classes. Maybe the problem is that you are poor?

Yeah, but is he NOW?

I think you meant to say “deafening the hearer of the hot dog sandwich.” The expression is to “deafen the hearer,” like when HILLARY deafened the hearers of truth about Benghazi.

That’s some hot dog sandwich-level trolling.

Can’t wait for his tell-all biography, Final Fantasy.

I’m sure the Chicago Daily Tribune would have edited their “Dewey Deflates Truman” headline if they could have. Talk about a screw up!

“I trusted you with curating the greatest Super Bowl lineup ever, Bruno. What do you MEAN you couldn’t book Ike Turner, Gary Glitter, Chris Brown, Eric Clapton, OR Subway Jared?!?!” - Roger Goodell