His behind-the-ears tattoo signifies that he’s killed a career.

I just assumed basketball in Australia looked like this:

Make America 8-8 again

There are gamers who probably haven’t uttered a single word in MONTHS.

Brian backtracking yesterday said that it was a PERSONAL, not NASCAR endorsement. Is he such a stupid CEO that he does not realize that his every action represents NASCAR? When you are the head of a major, very public organization, you lose your personal opinions, as least in public. Unless of course, you want to be a…

Meanwhile, on Birdspin:

This is a bad Bear.

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Well, we already know he’s drinking piss.

Seems like you’re the expert on it.

I knew I shouldn’t have stapled all of that haunted bologna to that Bible and taught it how to speak. I am sorry everyone.

A deeply mediocre team quarterbacked by Nick Foles isn’t exactly a big draw for the citizens of Los Angeles

A married father decided to attempt to woo a friend of mine who was his classmate in an English MA program. She was in a shitty relationship and flirted back a bit, to her current shame, they probably let things cross some lines but then my favorite thing of all time happened.

I do now, Cruzz! Just got a tip that there’s no wife or kid in Baltimore. The house of cards is falling...

you can thank Coca-Cola for giving these bears an inflated sense of self. Here’s the thing, Polar Bears. You are relevant for one month of the year. Do you even hear from Coke the rest of the year? Nope. If this is some shitty way to supplement your income, you’d be better off showing Panda Bears how to fuck.

What’s the point of terrorist attacks if the public doesn’t even know aliens exist? Terrorists are too weak to pose a serious threat, so they commit acts of terror to provoke governments to overreact and do stupid things.

For some reason I don’t feel like blaming the loss on the only guy who scored points for his team yesterday.

By promoting this comment, I’m giving Poopnachos more views, thereby validating him in his own mind

Zheleznogorsk, Russia has a bear trying to do bear science on an atom