Thank you for understanding and translating. You’re doing the lord’s work.

The Malaprop has been STRONG on this site for the last few months...

I love it. It’s like Kate and Wills showing up 7 hours after the birth with the baby to say, “Here’s your photo op, paps!” The Daily Mail and other paps have been stalking this guy since the engagement was even a rumor, usually painting him in an unflattering way - hermit loser, rather than average American retiree in…

Why is that? The woman who the podcaster was talking about is Simmon’s maid who has been with him for decades and has lived with him for years. And it is odd for her to be sitting at the head of the table. And the guy making  food with Richard is a Latino who was his masseur. Wyd?

The perfect response then, now, and forever.

such a good burn.

i’m with her...

As far as I’m concerned, peeing in a public pool past the age of like 4 is unacceptable. I mean come on man. Be an adult.

it was definitely on purpose hahaha

Can we also talk about the fact that Chrissy Teigen “sleeping” through his acceptance speech was probably not a coincidence?

Good for them! It is insane that we have a president who is using his position as THE FUCKING PRESIDENT to make more money for his companies/bring in more clientele.

I doubt she’s a size 4. I had gastric bypass surgery and was smaller than her at my starting weight and I’m an 8. Unless she’s like, super short and tiny? I’m 5'10" so I kind of stopped around a size 8.

She does look great, but I’m skeptical of that size 4 thing. She looks like I did at a size 8.

enough yard for you?

It doesn’t have the open floor plan that I was looking for. If we could open up that wall ... I like to do some entertaining.

Wouldn’t that make it the Cockswalds?

On a personal level, the modern waxed chest trend kind of weirds me out and I am perfectly fine with my men being hairy. But on a societal level, GOOD, FUCK YOU ALL, I SHOULDN’T HAVE TO SHAVE MY FUCKING LEGS TO BE CONSIDERED ATTRACTIVE, YOU CAN ALL SUFFER ANNOYING HAIR REMOVAL FOR DUBIOUS AESTHETIC REASONS TOO.

Trump couldn’t identify 90% of the countries in the world on a blank map.

Obama was born there, so Donald thinks it’s in Kenya....