In April, I saw a woman sneeze into her bare hand, place that hand on the counter, and then eat an ice cream cone. It’s still left me traumatized. It’s also when I realized that I could only do so much because my craving for a dairy bar cheeseburger might do me in.

Does Matthew McConaughey really want a round-the-clock job for 5 years (I’m counting the year that he’s running)? Right now, he can pick the projects he wants and hit the Amazon whenever he gets a wet dream. I highly suggest his interview on WTF with Marc Maron.

If only to see drunk Leah destroy her. Andy Cohen would bring Dorinda back to give her the Tinsley treatment, which Ivanka will actually deserve.

Ramona Singer and her 50 closest friends are just dying to host them in the Hamptons.

As a lawyer, the transcript excerpts give me so much anxiety, and then I remember that these lawyers have it coming to them and deserve sanctions if not eventual disbarment.

On the plane to her sister’s college graduation, David was held by her dad as she “shook uncontrollably in his arms for the entire flight.” She curled up in the hotel’s bathroom, crying and sucking on her weed pens. She woke up “screaming in agony,” her dad pulling her from the bed to stop her spiraling.

She joins Newsmax, now known as Trump TV, to be their Laura Ingraham. She’s promised millions, but the first check won’t even cash. She fades into oblivion.

There is a zero percent chance that she could have answered this question in any way that is satisfactory.

I’m sad to hear that. My dad was recently diagnosed, and we found out this week that it was caught early and still stage 1. It’s mild enough that he probably won’t even need treatment. I’ve never felt so relieved. When I saw the headlines this morning about Al, I was hoping for the same.

I have no outrage left to give for Jaden Smith and Kendall Jenner’s 25th birthday party, when our own governor did this...

I live in a house divided (waiting for the inevitable LTMF) responses. I originally planned on staying in a fancy downtown suite for election night until a friend decided to host a small gathering. (I’m kind of disappointed that I cancelled, but I need to save the money). Before cancelling, I invited a friend, also…

I’ve had so much anxiety built up over the election, and then I find out that my dad has been diagnosed with prostate cancer, and the follow up appointment to find if it’s in other parts of the body and determine a course of action is the DAY AFTER THE ELECTION! I’d always planned on taking that day off, but it was…

Send to my best friend as the quote of the day. Thank you.

I have one of those lists t-shirts that has the last names of the female Supreme Court justices. I will not be getting an updated one.

Another down side of having a baby when you’re young is that when you’re 42, he’s 23, so now everyone looks like your son or son’s friends.

I think she’d be great on city council. Local politics is underrated.

Logged into Ulta to add to my wishlist. If I buy the duo for $32 and spend an extra $10, then I can buy the Lancome beauty box for $72.50. That’s how they get you!

Maybe you’ll sway him just enough not to bother to vote, and that’s something.

I changed to Benefit Bang. It doesn’t have quite the same impact as Better than Sex, but it doesn’t leave me looking like I have a tequila hangover within an hour of application. I’m always looking for recommendations though. I admit that I love some big clumpy spidery lashes.

Not cutting her slack because she brags about being uneducated in a 60 minutes interview. She’s a high school dropout. Being raised in a republican household and not valuing education pans out.