Someone once tried to give me a mini dachshund and I have always regretted not taking it. It was so adorable.

If there’s one thing I know it’s that shelving movie projects multiple times due to things like bankruptcy yields massive opening weekends.

You should try it! I like the pretzel chip kind of pretzels with the everything seasoning. Mmm.

Sex: do it for the kids.

Dude mine just got delivered two days ago. Heaven is real and it exists directly in front of that puppy when it's blasting 62 degree air on my twat and face.

I said basically the same thing only sub cheesecake for pot and cream cheese with pretzels. I like the cut of your jib.

The only things I’m gonna crush this weekend is the rest of my weed, a bag of pretzels and package of cream cheese, and at least 2 seasons of the Golden Girls while sitting spread eagle in front of my new AC unit that just got delivered.

‘Donated’ to ‘charity’?

Only half.

Someone I know recently shared a picture of Steven Tyler singing at some event recently and it took me a solid 15 minutes before I realized it wasn't an old lady with dark hair trying to be Stevie Nicks.

Even if she isn’t she was still trying to appeal to people who are by trying to take a neutral shrug idk who can never be sure stance to try and garner support. What blows my mind is that the small pool of Sanders supporters who were/are talking about voting for her crow incessantly about how badly HRC panders.

Jezebel very recently posted an article stating that dry shampoo can cause hair loss since it plugs up your follicles with all that muck.

Jezebel very recently posted an article stating that dry shampoo can cause hair loss since it plugs up your…

They are so salty they are losing their community they have to shit on this one.

Don’t even bother it’s people making the most asinine generalizations about the entire website and commenters based on a single interaction they had. As if gawker is some bastion of levelheadedness and intelligence.

like 80% of them are just butt hurt from getting banned years ago. The rest of them either can't make up they're minds that it's too feminist over here or not feminist at all

Dude I saw it and wanted to be like seriously half you people are the scourge of the planet shut the fuck up.

no thanks.

If you have a dog or cat that shits in your house you should crate your pet when you’re gone. It’s not Roomba’s fault your animal is incontinent/untrained.

So just popped back over from the linked TMZ article showing Johnny Depp’s mutilated finger detailing his descent into shit ass wife beating derangement thinking ‘Maybe something cheeky got posted in the last few minutes that will distract me from the horrors of life’.

I LITERALLY ONLY CLICKED BECAUSE OF THE PHRASE ‘FUCK FEST’.