Have you not seen Death Bed: The Bed That Eats? You’ll never sleep on a mattress again.

You know what else is good enough for me? C is for cookie.

This was HIGHLY accurate. Excellent work, Mr. Finger.

“No, they’re your problem...”

Judging by the lead picture though, he appears to be at least an eight-star general. You should show some respect, maybe! And, I dunno, can’t really see his left side. He could well have sixteen stars on him. You don’t want to mess with that, my friend.

Free your mind and your penis will follow?

Well, if penises were not supposed to fly free, why did God give mine wings?

It’s just a joke. Although, pink outfits for the prisoners is pretty funny too.

I’m an ogre you speciest fuck!

Shitlord cuckstain? Sad!

Nursing a racial grievance? Sad!

User name referencing gray status? Sad!

Concern trolling? Sad!

Shame-shaming? Sad!

Way to go Page Six and the ensuing hoards. Stressing a pregnant woman with your shit.

Obviously I don’t know what caused the breakup of these two, nor do I give a particular fuck.

i don’t think calling people out for their gin blossoms counts as body shaming, as you only get them from years of dedicated heavy drinking. i have little sympathy for people who are banana yellow from cirrhosis of the liver, either (i had an uncle who drank himself to death after spending his drunken life abusing his…

Wikepedia hasn’t discovered it for us yet? Wikepedia hasn’t discovered it for us yet?!? Wikipedia hasn’t discovered it for us yet. The people behind this show, do they know what Wikipedia is? I would have changed the channel the moment after reading that.

This is why I've been rewatching Friends. Dumb jokes, familiar, not sad

I forgot it was on and read online what the spoiler is. I did say OMG out loud but I don’t know that it would have made me cry.